The 7 Stages Of Buying A Smartphone

Be it an iPhone, an Android or even a low-end Windows Phone, all of us know the perks of having a good smartphone, and with all those perks, comes that exhilarating adrenaline-filled feeling you get when that incredible moment arrives. That moment of heavenly awesomeness when you finally get to see that blessed sealed box, almost begging to be opened and when you finally rush home almost bursting with excitement, it’s like you can’t wait even a second to tear it down, start up your very new smartphone and start Snapchatting, Instagramming, WhatsApping and well, smartphone stuff.

Recently having bought a new smartphone, I went through the exact same phases and although I do get a little overly excited, but that moment of having the first glimpse at the smartphone after opening the box is one of my most treasured moments. To sum up the whole experience, I decided to compile the whole experience of buying a new smartphone in a collection of 7 GIFs i.e. the internet’s favorite way.

1. The One with the Money Counting

This is the stage when you are in desperate need of a new smartphone(and lots of money), and you start counting your money and searching for every nook and cranny of your house for some extra cash.

2. The One with the Online Searching

This is the part where you, after having realistically evaluated your budget, try to find a decent mobile phone for that budget. It is the most grueling part ever, that involves reading through tonnes of reviews, watching loads of videos, surfing one website after another, all in search for that perfect smartphone that is at least worth what little money you have.

Online shopping sites become your haven, Google your pathway and you spend all your time, trudging on that path from one website to another, again and again. You become synonymous with the words “deals” and “sale”, as these are the first words that pop to your eyes. It becomes a war of prices, a tussle of spec vs spec, a fight between a pixel over pixel.

3. The One with the Ordering

After tonnes of unboxings, reviews (written and videos both), specs-oggling, you have finally found out your mobile-mate and just a couple of tantrums later, you finally manage to convince yourself (or your parents) to let you buy that gadgetry-perfection. It’s that critical moment before you take the leap, before you make that final decision… and then you press that button! It’s DONE! Your work is done.

On the other hand, if you are one of those people who like to buy their smartphones the old-fashioned way in shops, you have a slightly different experience as you hand over your money with that air of finality, ignoring the shopkeeper’s greedy eyes while your own eyes can’t stop staring at that shiny box. If you are one of those, you are lucky for you need not go through the excruciatingly painful fourth stage.

4. The One with the Waiting

Finally free from the curse of having to look at phones after every few minutes, now starts the worst stage, the wait. Like the five minute wait before you are handed the paper as you sit in the examination hall, not able to study, nor to start writing, waiting in pain and tension while praying for the best, this is the same kind of wait; only a 100 times more excruciating and a million times longer. You actually start to miss the 2nd stage! What if you could have searched some more? What if you could have found a better option or a better deal? What if you could have went on a hunger strike for a month, saved some money, and then buy a smartphone? What if that color doesn’t look good? Can you paint it black? WHAT IF…

The endless wait goes on and on… multiplying exponentially by every passing moment. Again and again, you open the ordering site to track your order but instead of speeding the process up (as it should), this has absolutely no effect on the shipping time. You start day dreaming about your smartphone, the apps you would download, the games you would play… you already have a list, don’t you? And at last… This excruciating period of waiting comes to a close, making way for the best and the final stage!

5. The One with the Phone Itself

“Ring, Ring”. The bell! You leap off your bed, sprint to the door and with shaking hands, open the door… to see the heavy moustached face of the milkman. Severely disappointed, you take the milk shopper and are about to take the walk of disappointment back inside, when you catch a glimpse of a white courier van pulling up your driveway. IT’S HERE! The milk goes flying out of your hand and as your heart thumps like a marching band’s feet, you take the package and are back in your house within seconds.

Tearing the packaging in seconds, you just gawk at the beautiful box that has been the home to your beloved to-be smartphone but then your patience finally runs out and you brutally rip off the box(but not brutally enough to let any harm come to your smartphone). There it is! A black slab of a touchscreen, barely a few millimetres thick. And all you can do is jump around like a maniac, much to the concern of your family who still can’t understand your obsession with the smartphone or why is it so expensive (“Itna mehnga phone lainay ki kia zroorat hai?”).

6. The One with the Honeymoon Phase

So now, you have your smartphone and all the wonders it brings with it. It’s your honeymoon phase with the smartphone. You take selfies at restaurants, play games to pass the time on your daily commute, listen to the music while lying on the grass, look at photos of other people’s food on Instagram, comment on your friends’ newest display pictures on Facebook, it’s like a dream come true. You don’t throw your new phone around, like you did with your old phone(except for Nokia users, as a Nokia does more damage to the surroundings than to itself), but you place the phone gently, softly, like a baby.

You take care of the phone, clean it with a velvety cloth, careful not to let the phone look dirty even for a few seconds. All your friends envy you (or at least pretend to envy you if they have better phones and they are good friends). They ask for treats and you joke if you should sell your phone to give to treat them because all your money went into buying it, but of course you can’t even think of parting with your new digital soulmate. You ignore all the little flaws and call all the reviewers who gave it a below 10 delusional and mad. Life’s good. It’s too good, and maybe, it is too good to be true, as evident by the next and final stage.

7. The One with the Reality Check

As the honeymoon phase fades away, you start to see the flaws in your phone. It starts to show why it was in an affordable budget. It’s not the perfect phone and nor is it the best phone ever made, but it’s good, and you love it, but not like when it was brand new.You start to throw it around a bit, first on the bed from a few inches, then on the sofa… and so on. Gradually, you start to not care about the appearance as much, a bit of dust gets in… It falls down a couple of times, a few dents here and there and it’s all back to the normal.

Your life is incredibly better with it and you can’t live without it but you know deep down in your heart that this relationship would only last an year, or two at the very most, and then you’ll move on, to the next phone and again, through the seven stages, and again and life will go on, smartphone or no smartphone.

Image and Gif Credits- Bgr, Giphy.